{"id":223,"date":"2019-06-09T19:59:03","date_gmt":"2019-06-09T19:59:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.ims-online.com\/?p=223"},"modified":"2019-06-09T20:17:37","modified_gmt":"2019-06-09T20:17:37","slug":"double-bind-paradox","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blog.ims-online.com\/index.php\/2019\/06\/09\/double-bind-paradox\/","title":{"rendered":"HOW TO DEFEAT THE DOUBLE-BIND PARADOX"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

He’s\nthe boss, she’s bossy. He’s assertive, she’s domineering. He strategizes, she\nschemes. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

He’s powerful and likeable, she’s powerful or<\/em> likeable.<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

As males rise in rank and status at work, they retain (and often increase) their perceived likeability \u2013 so they can be both powerful and likeable. The Double-Bind Paradox <\/strong>states that women must project authority in order to advance in the business world, but the more powerful they appear, the less they are liked. Catalyst, an organization that studies women in leadership, calls this the \u201cdammed if you do, doomed if don\u2019t\u201d dilemma. Their research shows that women in power can be seen as capable or likeable — but rarely both.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Blame it on the stereotypes we hold of women as nurturing, sensitive and collaborative, When their behavior is congruent with these traits, women are liked, although not seen as especially powerful. When their behavior runs counter to the stereotype, they are perceived more negatively. A frequently cited Harvard Business School study, the Heidi\/Howard case<\/a>, shows that when the same highly assertive and successful leader is described to grad students (of both genders), that person is seen as far more appealing when given a male name instead of a female one.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Does\nthat mean that female leaders are indeed \u201cdammed or doomed\u201d as Catalyst\nsuggested? Well, maybe not.<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

One encouraging possibility that addresses this bias comes from another study at Stanford Graduate School of Business that found businesswomen who are assertive and confident, but who can turn these traits on and off depending on the social circumstances, get more promotions than either men or other women. This research suggests the most successful women have developed a strategic ability to read a situation and alter their behavior accordingly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Here\u2019s where body language comes in. <\/h4>\n\n\n\n

When working with a leader, followers continuously and unconsciously assess her nonverbal signals for warmth (empathy, likeability, caring) and authority (power, credibility, status). So knowing how your body language cues are most likely to be perceived<\/a> can be the first step to being able to move successfully from making one impression to the other.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Take head positions, for example. Head\ntilting is a signal that someone is listening and involved — and a\nparticularly feminine gesture. As such, head tilts can be very empathetic\nand warm, but they are also subconsciously processed as submission signals.\n(Dogs tilt their heads to expose their necks, as a way to show deference to the\ndominant animal.) Remember to use head tilts when you want to demonstrate your\nconcern for and interest in members of your team or when you want to encourage\npeople to expand on what they are saying. But when you need to project power\nand confidence — when asking for a job promotion or giving a presentation to\nsenior management — keep your head straight up in a more neutral (and\nauthoritative) position.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Then\nthere is the matter of posture. Status and authority are nonverbally\ndemonstrated through claiming height and space. Watch the high-status males in your organization. They almost always expand\ninto available space and take up room. So, when you want to project status,\nremember to stand tall, pull your shoulders back, widen your stance, and hold\nyour head held high. On the other hand, when you want to display empathy or\nincrease collaboration, you\u2019ll also want to minimize your power signals, and\nreplace them with warmer ones — forward leans, head nods, and aligned\nshoulders, torso, legs pointed toward whomever is speaking.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gestures Send a Message<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Gestures, too, send their own messages, and by paying attention, you can make sure they are sending the right message. Since early history, people showed their palms to one another to display the fact that they were unarmed \u2013 and therefore friendly. Open arms with palms showing indicate candor and inclusiveness, so they are very effective when you want to proclaim your sincerity or build trust in a group. Projecting confidence and certainty is achieved by \u201csteepling\u201d<\/strong> (finger tips touching, palms separated) or rotating your hands palms-down. Both gestures indicate that you are absolutely sure of your position. (Just watch that you don\u2019t overuse them and weaken the impact.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s a similar issue with physical animation. When you want to pull people into a discussion, stay animated in your facial expressions and use your hands as illustrators to make what you are describing more vivid. But when you want to maximize your authority, maintain more of a \u201cpoker face\u201d and minimize your gestures<\/a> by keeping them smaller and displaying most of them at waist height.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The obvious implication of the Stanford research for women who want to advance in their organizations is to master the ability to display competence and power when the situation requires it, and to signal warmth and empathy when it is most effective to do so. That\u2019s how body language can help you defeat the Double-Bind Paradox<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Carol Kinsey Goman, Ph.D.<\/a>,<\/strong> is the president of Kinsey Consulting Services. She\u2019s an international keynote speaker and an authority on the impact of body language on leadership effectiveness, and her passion is helping talented women build their leadership presence. Carol\u2019s clients include over 200 organizations in 25 countries. Her programs for women leaders have been presented at events including European Women in Technology, Amazon, Women@Google, Expedia \u2013 Global Women\u2019s Conference, Executive Women\u2019s Forum, Stanford University, and UNC School of Government \u2013 Engaging Women in Public Service.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Carol is a leadership blogger for Forbes <\/em>and the author of twelve business books including The Silent Language of Leaders: How Body Language Can Help \u2013 or Hurt \u2013 How You Lead<\/a><\/em>. She has been cited as an authority in media such as Industry Week, Investors\u2019 Business Daily, CNN\u2019s Business Unusual, PBS Marketplace<\/em>, the Washington Post\u2019s On Leadership<\/em> column, MarketWatch radio, and the NBC Nightly News. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dr. Carol Kinsey Goman<\/a> is presenting two programs for IMS<\/a> in November in Los Angeles<\/a> and Kansas City<\/a>. Sign up to experience these highly interactive sessions. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The Double-Bind Paradox states that women must project authority in order to advance in the business world, but the more powerful they appear, the less they are likedContinue Reading<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":205,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[32,31,28,29,21,34,30],"tags":[24,44,42,43,25],"yoast_head":"\nHOW TO DEFEAT THE DOUBLE-BIND PARADOX<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"The Double-Bind Paradox states that women must project authority in order to advance in the business world, but the more powerful they appear, the less they are liked\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/blog.ims-online.com\/index.php\/2019\/06\/09\/double-bind-paradox\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta 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